Introduction

I expect most of you all want is a simple life, but why is life so complicated and, to be frank, bloody well annoying.

Quick answer – people. We are all different, which can be just great, I love people watching, but there are people out there who make life a complete misery.

I am a simple man, who likes simple things. I am not ready to be classed as a “grumpy old man”, well not yet. I am not a Victor Meldrew, I am me, Mark Sells, who lives with my lovely fiancée, in a modern little terraced house in a pretty village.

I like to laugh, I love silliness, I enjoy all things village and rural where there’s a relaxed aura about the place. I enjoy a nice pint of cider, a game of cricket and classical music to relax and watch sunsets.

I enjoy breaks in the UK (during term time off course), tasting the local food and sampling the local ales.

But don’t things just annoy you? And can someone tell me what normal is?

Since October 13^th, when things did really annoy me, I have made observations of things which I find blooming annoying, some of which made me smile at the end.

How did me day go rapidly downhill on Tuesday October 13^th?

That day was a pretty horrendous day to say the least, it seems that everyone wanted to piss me off on Tuesday, well in fact it got worse; pretty hard to believe, well personally I thought it wouldn’t get any worse.

My friends and colleagues were somewhat supportive, with their comments on social media with things like: “Didn’t know they reduced it to a day,” and “I’ll make sure it lasts a week.” What are friends for?

So what did annoy me on that particular day in October, well here we go:

• Parking space pinched as I was just about to reverse in to it.
• Car washers in supermarket car parks, felt like I was being threatened to have my car washed.
• ASDA in general. I still haven’t forgotten the broken tooth I found in box of Crunchy Nut Flakes, just look out!
• Inconsiderate drivers, especially van drivers. No you don’t own the road.
• Drivers who don’t signal their intentions on a roundabout – I am not a mind reader.
• An idiot who tried to overtake on a corner, suddenly a huge lorry came around the bend, he didn’t have enough power to finish his manoeuvre, brake suddenly then go back in behind. And then when he reached the traffic lights, which are on red, move over to the filter lane to overtake once it turned to amber, annoying all drivers in the queue. Not bad, nearly two accidents in a space of 100 yards.  It’s the innocent who suffer matey boy!
• Car insurance renewal. £100 more than last year, sorry not paying it. The same company who tried to charge me £25 to change my address last year. Sorry, not paying it.
• Mobile Phones. I am sure EE stands for Everything Everywhere. Now that is a contradiction in terms if I have ever heard one. Sorry EE, it doesn’t mean that whatsoever.

I could go on; in fact my week went downhill from Tuesday. I even found that a crack had appeared on my windscreen to round off the week nicely.

So over the next year I will explore different things in everyday life what makes me annoyed, and ask the question why no on numerous occasions. I may even fall in to one of the categories, and I expect I do.

Let’s make October 13^th 2016 “National Piss Mark Sells Off Day”. Put it in your diaries.